First of all, it is NEVER an overreaction to call someone out when you are groped or assaulted in public. If it really WAS an accident, one would hope the person would apologize immediately in an authentic way. If they stay silent, they likely did it on purpose and are betting on your silence to keep them from getting in trouble, which only lets them know they can keep doing it without getting in trouble. That’s not to say that it’s your job to keep abusers from assaulting others, I just mean that every time we call a sexual assaulter out or defend ourselves against them, they are a little less willing to try that shit again on anyone, ourselves included.
I took a verbal self-defense course, so I’m just going to espouse to you some of what I learned: You could just think of a few lines to try so that if/when it happens, the words are already in your mouth. If you’re unsure if the person meant to touch you, you could firmly ask “Did you just touch my ___?” and if they react in any way that isn’t “Oh my god, I did. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to.”, then you know their intention. If you can tell it was not an accident, look him right in the eye and say, loudly and firmly “Don’t. Touch. Me.” or “Leave. Me. Alone.” If there are a lot of people around and it was a blatant attempt, you can ignore the guy and scream to all bystanders “This man just touched my ___! Everyone look out for this guy, he’s groping women without permission.” Use that if you want to humiliate him. Avoid swear words, aggressive statements or threats. These might result in the guy getting defensive. Practice saying these kinds of statements in the mirror or recite them in your head when you’re in a place you think you might be groped or assaulted. Also, practice standing in a confident way: legs slightly apart, back straight, arms at your sides, shoulder blades pushed together, chin up. Doing this will not only make you look like a more confident person to potential harassers (who are more likely to attack people who look weak, submissive, or distracted), the physical act of standing that way will actually give you confidence, which is super cool. I hope this helps, good luck and remember: you don’t deserve to be touched by ANYONE without your consent, and you are allowed to defend yourself if and when it happens.
White people in a non Euro centric history class
What is the most astounding fact you can share with us about the Universe?
Neil deGrasse Tyson, PhD: The most astounding fact… is the knowledge that the atoms that comprise life on Earth, the atoms that make up the human body, are traceable to the crucibles that cooked light elements into heavy elements in their core under extreme temperatures and pressures. These stars, the high mass ones among them went unstable in their later years they collapsed and then exploded scattering their enriched guts across the galaxy. Guts made of carbon, nitrogen, oxygen and all the fundamental ingredients of life itself. These ingredients become part of gas cloud that condense, collapse, form the next generation of solar systems… stars with orbiting planets, and those planets now have the ingredients for life itself.
So that when I look up at the night sky and I know that yes, we are part of this universe, we are in this universe, but perhaps more important than both of those facts is that the universe is in us.
When I reflect on that fact, I look up – many people feel small because they’re small and the universe is big – but I feel big, because my atoms came from those stars. There’s a level of connectivity. That’s really what you want in life, you want to feel connected, you want to feel relevant, you want to feel like a participant in the goings-on of activities and events around you. That’s precisely what we are, just by being alive…
public reaction to police posting pictures from inside a grow house found near police station in Indiana.
Pretty heartbreaking. These beautiful and bright students deserve so much better. Above I included some of the photographs (there’s many more) of Black women who are students there because I think it’s important to point out how racism is not only impacting Whites’ perception of their intelligence but also how White people approach their appearance as well, in gender-specific ways. This is heartbreaking to me albeit not surprising. The myth that working hard = happy payoff is a fairy tale. Racism is ubiquitous.
I really wish them the best with their education and the ability to navigate these microaggressions and overt acts of racism. This stuff increases stereotype threat and impacts mental health and health which impacts performance. I want the best for them. Much love. ❤